OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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