girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize