yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
