Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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