Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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