Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
