areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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