My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
