apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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