no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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