Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
honey bunches of taint.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize