her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
