i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize