i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
