She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
