I am in a vortex of obligation.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
