I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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