is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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