# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I have aggressive nipples.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize