She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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