i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
