new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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