are you still at the devil's house?
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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