My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
