I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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