just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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