i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
