just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
