I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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