Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize