I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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