Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Randomize
