the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
