Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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