She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
