Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize