If i come over, it means nothing
The maid of honor just puked.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
