Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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