My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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