If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Damn victory sex feels great
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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