I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
