Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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