worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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