Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
