it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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