I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
