Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
