I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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