i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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