It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
