Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Vodka?
Forever.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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