Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
